Sunday, November 21, 2010

Sunday Nov. 21st 2010

I stared into the Emptiness
Thought it time
Soon enough,
For my death
A hopeless existence ravaged by a past I cannot salvage
No matter how much I bargain
No matter how much I repent.
I was sure
That all hope was lost
All love was lost
All happiness
All freedom
And my worthiness of such precious “gifts”
Gone the day Everything I Thought I Had
and
All that I thought I’d built
Broke,
I was wrong.

I stared into the Unquestioned
Waiting for the vastness to swallow me whole
Waiting for the coldness to rattle me numb
The weight of it all compressing me deeper and deeper into the seat of my being
The weight of it all hollowing
Shifting
Filling me instead with a lingering sweetness
Inside of me
Strength
Love
Peace
A flower that I crush against my cheek
The scent nourishes me
A seed planted deep in my womb
Here
Inside of me
An open sky
The scent of the ocean
The sunlight on my skin
Love (again)
Friendship
Laughter
Lust
Intrigue
Inside of me
Adventure
Passion
Dreams upon Dreams
Moonlit caresses
You holding me

I carry the Universe inside this being
I carry the Universe inside of me
Feel freedom’s flight through a bird’s wing
I know
It‘s all here
Inside of me.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

This Love is All Me

This love is a vessel that beats inside of me
It never leaves
It moves where I move
It breathes where I breathe
And though you have chosen a life without me
This love chooses me
Nurtures me
Sustains me
And though you have chosen a life without me
This love/ Your love still flourishes
The flora and fauna of my being
It cannot die
There is no end and no beginning
There is no less and no more
There is only a love that lasts for all time
Changing shape and changing face
Demanding nothing of me
This loves fills the silence between us with things like
Compassion and
Understanding
This love says it’s okay that we are over
I only want you to be happy
I only want the best for you whatever that may be
This love does't understand words like
Abandoned
Alone
Discarded
Abused
This love says that This is enough
That I Am Enough
That indeed I have everything I could ever need
You can’t touch this love
You can’t deny me this love
This love is all me
This love is all
Me

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Declaration of Independence

I am
Black
Caribbean
American
Woman

I am
Fleshy Lips
Protruding Hips
Thick Thighs
Narrow Waist

My hair curls rebelliously against my efforts to follow the
Straight and Narrow
Beautiful Ebony
Essence
Black Hair/Weave
Successful
Independent
Strong Sistas

I prefer Joan Osborne to
Aretha Franklyn
Alanis Morissette to
Indie Arie
but I love me some Lauren Hill

I wear Aeropostale
Forever 21
Charlotte Russe
No Sean Jean
Babyfat or
House of Dereon

I like
Black
White
Chinese
Indian
Hispanic boys
slanted eyes
curly hair
freckles
dark skin

My grandmother is half Portuguese
Half Indian
Even she is a part of me

I eat
eggs
cheese
milk
but consume no flesh
no meat

What part of me do you find discomforting?
What part of me should I ignore for the sake of your sanity,
for the sake of your acceptance
approval
respect
love?

This is me
This is who I am
Listen if you can to my voice,
There is only one.