Sunday, June 3, 2012

The Thought of Losing You

The thought of losing you caused so much pain I wanted to run from it
I wanted instead to feel nothing
To eat something
To watch something
To clean everything
To talk
To laugh
To sing
To dance
To move away from the rawness of my heart
To move away from the truth
You are leaving
My teacher told me that I am to sit with it
I am stubborn
My teacher told me to sit in it
Love is not possession
My teacher told me to swim in it and so I swam into the inky blackness
Blind to an end and an outcome but hoping
I swam
The fire in my lungs burning away my tears
I dove
Deeper and deeper into the darkness
I plunged
Until there was
Only light
Only ribbons of sparkling water on the bed of the ocean
(A heart ripping open until there is no pain, no numbness, no heart)
Only me a crystal reflecting the sun
Only me
Only bliss
Only love

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