I’m in love with your sleeping form,
The way your male perfection leans itself towards me
Sometimes turning away.
You always want,
And it’s more than I can give
And it’s always now, on your terms
Later isn’t a part of your vocabulary.
I say it quietly
I scream at the top of my lungs
I’m losing any understanding
I lash out and I’m sorry
But you don’t listen,
You can’t even hear me.
It’s taken some time but I’ve grown accustomed to sleeping alone;
There’s always someone else that can meet your needs better than I ever could.
Now you’re here,
And I guess that’s what matters most.
You find your way back to me in your own time,
It doesn’t make me love you any less.
I don’t know what it is some nights that makes you wanna stay
I watch you intently every time you sigh and shift,
Wondering what I will do this time to make you leave.
Here I am treading water
Keeping these aftershocks of emotions in check
Trying to meet the terms and conditions
Of a love that is as often withheld as it is freely given.